A Show Up My Alley

Well, sorta.  The true show for me would be Tomfoolery, but Copenhagen isn't too far off.  A play about a bunch of scientists who actually discuss the science they studied.  Woo-hoo!  I'm playing Bohr.  I may have to give a small physics lecture to the other actors regarding just what we're talking about.  The performance is at OnStage Playhouse in Chula Vista, January 30 and 31.

Come on down and see if we can make quantum mechanics interesting.  It won the Tony for Best Play, but it is not a simple piece to work through.

See, What'd I Tell You

You do a show, you vanish.

But in this case, something else vanished:  My voice.

On October 2, I felt an itch in my ear.  Eh, perhaps a sore throat/cold is coming on.  Sure enough, the next day was a bit worse and by Monday, it's a full blown sore throat.  I take the day off from work to let myself get better.  But it doesn't get better.  In fact, it's become so bad that swallowing is becoming extremely painful.  I can do it, but I end up screaming in pain.  Not just wincing:  Screaming.  And since I can't swallow without this massive amount of pain, I end up drooling as I'm trying to get any sleep.

So I go to the ER to find out what's wrong.  I stay by the trashcan/water fountain in the waiting room so I can spit into it rather than swallow.  They finally take me into an exam room and I sit around there for a while, spitting into the sink.  Finally a doctor comes to take a look down my throat.  "Yep, it's pretty inflamed."  They take a swab to see if it's strep and order X-rays to see if it's an abcess.  If it's the former, then they can give me antibiotics and I'm done.  If it's an abcess, that's not as easy as they'd need to stick a needle in my throat to drain it, but it's still treatable.

But, the culture comes back negative and the X-ray shows no abcess (though they do find something else).  "You have 'viral pharyngitis,'" they tell me, which is just a medical way of saying I have a sore throat.  They offer me viscous lidocaine to help with the pain for now.  I have some hope, but not much for this.  No, not that lidocaine doesn't work for me but that they're asking me to swallow something for pain in my throat.

I have never, ever had an orally administered anesthetic actually work on my throat.  Lozenge, spray, doesn't matter.  Of course, I'm not actually surprised by this:  Swallowing something means it goes down my esophagus and the pain is in my trachea.  Humans have this special flap known as the epiglottis that closes off the trachea when you swallow to ensure that what you swallow goes down to the stomach, not the lungs.

And sure enough, the lidocaine doesn't work.  My tongue is numb and I can't feel the motion of my throat swallowing, but I can still feel the massive pain of swallowing.  But since what I have is viral, there's nothing they can do about it and they send me home.

And for the next three days, I am unable to eat or drink anything.  I mean nothing.  And I still have rehearsal.  And with my sore throat, my voice is becoming more and more hoarse.  The director is very nice with me and doesn't push, but I'm nervous as hell because opening night was only three weeks away.

After three days, I can start swallowing again...sorta.  About a quarter teaspoon at a time and I have to make sure that I completely finish the first swallow before I move to the second or the pain is massive again.  And I've picked up a cough.  It's not productive, but it is persistent.  Great.  I can't talk and forget about singing.

And everybody is giving me cures for sore throats.  Ginger, cayene, you name it, they try to pour it down me and while it's disgusting, it doesn't work.  Tea is sorta working at least in the sense that I can get it down, but there's only so much tea a person can drink.  After about 10 days, I can start eating soup (in tiny little sips and the heat helps), and I am ravenous as I haven't eaten anything of substance in more than a week.

As opening night approaches, I'm getting worried that I won't be able to project.  We're going to be miked but even so, my voice is thrashed and I can't sing.  I tell the director that I would understand completely if he decided to get a replacement and I would stick around to help him get up to speed, but he's having none of it.  He's sure I'll be OK.  Me, not so much.

And sure enough, opening is difficult to get through.  My voice is back enough to get through the show, but some friends who saw it apparently had said to each other, "He's got something, doesn't he?"  Fortunately, the songs in Sherlock Holmes' Excellent Adventure are music hall types:  Not much in the way of range and you don't have to be the best singer to get through it.  But my hoarseness does make one section a bit creepy:

At the top of the show, Lucy Matravers has come to ask for Holmes' help.  Watson instantly falls in love upon seeing her, which makes Lucy a tad nervous.  As Sherlock asks her to say why she's there, she hesitates with Holmes immediately catching on:  "Oh, do not worry.  You may speak perfectly freely in front of Watson...although I'd advise you to avoid anything suggestive."

Except with my raspy voice trying to be the bastard son of Harvey Fierstein and Lauren Bacall, that line really should have been, "...although I'd advise you to avoid anything suggestive, Clarice."

And during each scene, I'm doing everything I can to stop myself from having a coughing fit.  And on top of that, my nose has started to run.  So not only do I have to stop myself from bringing up a lung, I have to stop myself from sniffling.  The joke is becoming that I'll finally be back to normal by the time the show closes at the end of November.

Little bit, day by day, I do get my voice back.  The hoarseness is mostly gone by the third week of the run, but I have no head voice to speak of and forget my falsetto.  Again, it is fortunate that the songs are right in the middle of my range so I can fake my way through them.  My big issue is the crowing I have to do at one point.  My "cock-a-doodle-do" is now more of a deeper croak.

And it turns out the joke wasn't so far off, though it's still too soon:  I have enough of my voice back when we close that there is no issue with the show, no coughing or sniffling, but I'm still missing the top six or seven notes of my range.  And on top of that, I have a benefit concert to sing in mid-December.  Oy.

But time seems to have been the healer it is always claimed to be and I now have my voice back.  The benefit goes off without a hitch.

Oh, and that thing they found in the X-ray?  It seems that I have an extra bone in my neck, by the hyoid.  Freaked the X-ray tech out a bit.  "What on earth is that?"  Um, what on earth is what?  Don't take an X-ray of my neck and then say something like that.  "Oh, it isn't anything bad.  You've just got an extra bone.  Have you always had it?"  Well, I've never had an X-ray of my neck before and since I don't recall any aliens implanting anything in there (though the modus operandi is that you don't remember), I'd have to say yes.

I Can't...I Have Rehearsal

See, this is what happens to actors.  They get involved in a show and they vanish from the face of the earth.  I wanted to make sure that I kept this up...writing at least every other day if not every day and what happens?  Three weeks without an update.

I've been cast in the Coronado Playhouse production of Sherlock Holmes' Excellent Adventure.  I'm playing Sherlock, which came as a bit of a surprise as mentioned previously.  I've got a lot of homework to do for this one.  Since it's a parody, it's important to be up on all of the Sherlock trivia to establish the baseline.  Thus, all of the jokes will make sense.  I've never read any of the stories and while I've heard a couple of BBC Radio adaptations, I've not really had too much experience with Holmes.

I've been looking through online videos of Jeremy Brett since he's considered one of the definitive Holmeses out there.  Unfortunately, the first one I saw was "The Dying Detective" which has Brett going a bit over the top.  The large-scale plot is the same:  A young woman of breeding has come to Holmes to help her save her house from the clutches of an evil relative who is going to put her out.  In "The Dying Detective," it's her husband's cousin who happens to be a doctor specializing in the treatment of rare diseases.  He's seemingly killed his cousin and due to a quirk in the will, the estate goes to him.  Holmes, in an attempt to suss the confession out, pretends to have the same disease and has an hysterical fever fit, berating Watson as a horrible physician.

Well, I've been playing Holmes a bit over the top, too, and the director has been on me about that.  "Yeah, but the episode I saw is precisely the way I've been playing him!"  Yeah, yeah, but that's not quite what we want.  So, I'm going through others.  From what I can see, Brett played Holmes as understanding that he had a reputation and while it wasn't all false, it wasn't all true, either.  Underneath, he has a strong understanding of human interaction and while he remains detached from the expression of emotion, he understands that others need it and is not above providing it when they require it.  At the end of "The Dying Detective," the daughter of the woman goes to thank Holmes and you can see that she's a bit scared of him.  Holmes remains his formal self and then, ever so quickly, flashes her a grin.

There's also a fair amount of physical work in this.  We're having a minimal set so the train sequence is done mostly via mime.  At one point, Holmes and Watson have to squeeze into the toilet, so there's a fair amount of "man in a box" going on.

And then there's the accent.  I do a fairly decent British accent (having just done a couple British plays recently, No Sex Please, We're British! and Betrayal), but it's always nice to have more training.  Our coach for this show is being exact with me.  Apparently, I'm a bit nasal which, in British circles, tends more towards buffoonish characters.  I've got a good grasp of the form of the vowels and the peculiarities of pronunciation compared to American English ("ad-VER-tiss-ment" rather than "ad-ver-TIZE-ment"), but it's a question of placement.  Twenty years of musical theatre training of singing through my nose is catching up to me.

We open on October 30th.  It should be fun.

Going Against Type

As I write this, I am in Georgia. Work has sent me across the country to conduct some training for our clients. I've never been to Georgia and it's been a good time, the weather's been pleasant, and it's another state to check off the list of one's I've been to.

City of Angels closed with some good friends in the audience. Finally, somebody got the "without taking his pants down" joke! Four weeks of nothing and at last, I get a laugh. The group of actors over by the band for "All You Have to Do Is Wait" had almost everyone who wasn't on stage, it seemed.

For those who don't know, "All You Have to Do Is Wait" is a song near the end of Act I where Munoz arrests Stone, confident that he'll get the death penalty. Munoz hates Stone for getting away with murder and now he thinks he can pin another murder on Stone and he sings a Latin tune. It's been the hit of the show, the audiences love it, our actor does it wonderfully, and the cast tends to dance backstage while it's going on.

There wasn't anybody in the orchestra available to play the castanets, so one of the actors who knows how stepped up, so she's over by the orchestra. There also wasn't anybody to play the maracas so one of the actors who had one had stepped up and he's over there. Since my entrance is right after the song and is over by the orchestra area, I'm over there. Our shenanigans (after all, I am a very white man prancing around to a very non-white song) started gaining some noteriety as the band could see us and soon, more people came over to cavort with us. Very fun.

But that Monday, audtions for Sherlock Holmes' Excellent Adventure came along. Unfortunately, work was taking me to Georgia for the day of the callbacks and I was worried about not being able to be there. But, the director said not to worry, come audition.

Now, the character of Moriarty in the show apparently ends up playing a couple of women during the play as a means to learn what Holmes is up to. OK, that's been my gig for a while now. The Mystery of Irma Vep, Cinderella, The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged), God's Younger Brother, I've made a bit of a career wearing dresses. The acting awards of won all came from when I was in a drag role (though the recent Aubrey for Betrayal seems to have broken that string). And since Moriarty is a flamboyant character, I thought that I'd be going right up along my type.

But I've been cast as Sherlock. I'm certainly not sad or disappointed in any way, but it was a bit of a surprise. I had a similar reaction when I was cast in You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown as Schroeder. Schroeder? Well, I would have cast myself as Snoopy first. After all, he's a wild, zany character and I do that well. If not Snoopy, then Linus. He's an intellectual as am I. If not Linus, then Charlie Brown. He's a loser and I have a long history of that to draw upon. But Schroeder? Well, I do have a music background, but I wouldn't put it as the most clear type for me. I had a lot of fun as Schroeder (and he is in "My New Philosophy" which is a wonderful song), but it wasn't what I was expecting.

That said, Holmes is an intellectual so it isn't completely against type. I wonder who has been cast as Moriarty. He could be even better in a dress than I am!

Let Me Check My Schedule

So a lot of activity happening in the next few weeks. City of Angels closes today after a very good run. Only eight performances, but they were done over four weeks so it seems like this show has been going for a while. Auditions for Sherlock Holmes' Excellent Adventure are this Monday and then on Wednesday, I have to fly across the country for my work to give a training. Too, some theatre friends of mine have asked me to join them in a benefit performance later in September so there will be a few rehearsals for that, too.

Of course, it's always nice to be wanted and as the saying goes, when it rains, it pours. But, trying to do it all can be tiring. Of course, I don't have any part in Sherlock Holmes yet. While the director did ask me to audition, you don't actually have the role until you have the script in your hand.

Work has stepped up the number of trainings they wish to provide which means more office travel. I've been lucky with some of the training sessions work has asked me to do. I've been able to visit Alaska, Hawaii, Germany, and Japan. As an Air Force brat, I do like to be able to see the rest of the world. I hope I'll be able to keep up my acting habit as well as travel.

Of course, City of Angels was a bit of a scheduling issue, too. Two other directors were asking me to audition for them: A production of You Can't Take It With You and a production of See How They Run. I had done YCTIWY a few years back and wasn't sure I wanted to do it again and while I love working with the director of SHTR, I really wanted to do CoA. I'm a big fan of the Manhattan Transfer and the arranger of CoA was their arranger (which is why the Angel City 4 sounds so much like them). I count myself fortunate to not only have made it into the cast but also to be playing Stine. It was a good run.

Decisions, Decisions

One of the things I do in my spare time is play role-playing games with some old college buddies. Traveller, GURPS, Call of Cthulhu, RuneQuest, Dungeons & Dragons, we wander around the various games to see what's interesting. We'll even mix rules systems for other campaign settings. We have played RuneQuest and Traveller using Castle Falkenstein rules. Currently, we're in a D&D 4th Edition campaign. I'm playing a Cleric who is half-human, half-werewolf named "Xale" (ZAH-lay). He has not inherited any shapechanging abilities (that he knows of). His backstory is that his mother was a werewolf, his father was a human, they fell in love, and Xale was raised in a human village. Only a few people knew of her origins.

One day, raiders came to the village and in the process of defending his home, Xale accidentally set a fire that killed his mother. Wracked with guilt, he turned himself over to Selûne (we're playing in the Forgotton Realms milieu) and was invested as a priest with the admonition to go to the various good werewolf clans to seek their judgement. He has joined up with some others and is engaging in do-good activities while he wanders to seek the other clans.

As is typical for our Dungeon Master, the game is filled with bad choices: Currently, we have cleared out an evil temple of its minions and now need to go after the guy who was trying to break down the walls between the worlds and cause bad things. Because we just cleaned out the temple and the bad guy wasn't there, we have the advantage of surprise. If we don't track him down and deal with him right now, he will soon find out that something is up and react accordingly.

Of course, the DM has also decided that the leader of one of the werewolf clans happens to be nearby and Xale has to choose: Fulfill the first step of his quest and possibly be commanded to perform a service that might take some time or go after the bad guy while we are on a roll. My current thought is that Xale should meet with the clan leader now since fighting the bad guy may take a few days and the leader may be gone by the time we got back. I would hope that the clan leader would understand that a completed quest won't be of much good if the world is ending. I certainly don't expect him to come along to help (that would be too much of a good thing and we've already got five characters in the party as it is, one an NPC for the DM to control), and Xale does have a fair amount of Diplomacy so he might be able to make his case: I'm here, I need to talk to you, but I really need to do this one thing right now and when I come back, I am yours to command.

But City of Angels closes this weekend so the big decision will have to be put off for a couple weeks.

Watching Paint Dry

Well, now I know exactly what that's like.

It seems the home owner's association for my condo complex has decided to paint the doors (both front and garage) of all the units. Now, they have made a point (as HOA's often do) of letting the tenants know that this is really our responsibility and shame on us for not doing this ourselves over the past dozen years and how it is only out of the goodness of their hearts that they are doing this JUST THIS ONCE. But, should it be me who did it myself or they who did it, what it means is that the front door and the garage door needed to be left open so that the contractors could paint them and let them dry. And thus, to allow them access to my place and then make sure that while the doors were left open nobody walked into my place and helped themselves to my belongings, that means I got to spend my day off at home.

Literally watching paint dry.

Honesty Isn't Always a Virtue

I recently did a production of Betrayal, and there was a lot of work regarding character. For those who don't know, Betrayal is a work by Harold Pinter telling the story of a woman who has an affair with her husband's best friend. The play is presented backwards, starting two years after the affair is over and going back in time so that the final scene is the one where the affair begins. Thus, interactions between the characters are presented and only later do you find the instigating circumstances that led up to it. Robert and Emma are the married couple, Jerry is the friend. Robert is a book publisher and Jerry is a literary agent. They have known each other since college.

As it turns out, Robert finds out about the affair from Emma but does not tell Jerry that he knows. Too, Emma does not tell Jerry, either, until after the affair is over. The first set of scenes has Emma and Jerry meeting for a drink two years after the affair is over. Emma tells Jerry that she and Robert had a fight and she told Robert everything about the affair. They are getting divorced. Jerry, in shock, immediately calls Robert to talk to him, ostensibly to ask forgiveness, only to be shocked yet again when Robert tells him that he has known for years but never said anything.

We then go back in time to see the end of the affair, Emma and Jerry realizing that they simply can't find time for each other and deciding to shut down the flat they have been using for their trysts. The next scene is of Jerry over for a drink. He and Robert exchange some pleasantries when Emma joins them. Robert complains that he and Jerry never play squash anymore and when Jerry finally agrees to a game, Emma pipes up to ask if she can join to watch. Robert then launches into an ostensible tirade about how, "We wouldn't actually want a woman around, would we, Jerry?" With tension in the air, Jerry says that he'll be hard-pressed to find time as he is off traveling for business. It isn't directly stated, but it is clear that Emma is frustrated that Jerry no longer has time for her. The affair is over. After Robert escorts Jerry out, he returns to his wife and they share a kiss, but Emma breaks down crying.

In the next scene, Robert and Emma are in Venice, Italy on vacation. In a highly oblique way, Robert tells Emma about going into the American Express office and being offered a letter that was delivered for Emma from Jerry. With a great deal of beating around the bush, he finally cajoles Emma into admitting that she is having an affair with Jerry. Robert says he had no idea up until this letter. The affair has been going on for five years.

When they return from Italy, Emma and Jerry meet in their flat and they talk about Emma's holiday. Emma does not tell Jerry that Robert has found out, though she does press him about when Jerry and Robert may meet again as they often have lunch together. Jerry then does have lunch with Robert, who gets stinking drunk. They discuss Robert's holiday and Robert gives a miserable speech about how he feels he's sold out as a literary editor, ranting on about how Jerry and Emma have that in common: "You love modern prose literature. I mean you love the new novel by the new Casey or Spinks. It gives you both a thrill." The speech leads to what should be a climax of Robert saying that he knows, but he instead backs down, saying that he and Emma are very good together, that he values Jerry's friendship, and that Jerry should come over sometime as Emma "would love to see you."

It is a few years earlier and Emma and Jerry are establishing their flat. Emma has a revelation: She is pregnant. From the earlier scene in Venice we know that it is Robert's.

The final scene is a party at Robert's. Emma has gone to the bedroom to freshen up only to find a drunken Jerry in there, waiting for her. He woos her with passionate words which Emma seems to deflect off but it is getting to her. Robert comes in just as they kiss but sees nothing. Jerry sings the praises of Emma's beauty to Robert, who praises Jerry's friendship, in turn. Robert leaves and Emma follows, but Jerry takes hold of her hand. The affair has begun.

Now, the title of the play is Betrayal and everybody is betraying something here. Clearly Emma and Jerry are betraying their respective relationships to Robert, but what exactly is Robert betraying? And just as importantly, if not more so, why would Robert not say anything when he finds out?

My interpretation of Robert is that he truly did not know. His speech during lunch about how he has compromised his principles is indicative of why he doesn't say. He has worked hard to build what he thought would be the perfect life: He works in the world of books, which was his passion. He has a loving wife, children, a home. He has the best friend in the world.

And none of it is real.

All of it is a facade. Yes, he is a book publisher, but he doesn't like any of the books he publishes. He has become a purveyor of popular pulp when his first love is poetry. And his wife and best friend are sneaking around behind his back. Everything that he anchored his life around is nothing more than a façade, all surface and no depth. So, he decides not to break it. He will maintain the fiction of his life so that he can keep it.

In the first scene, when Emma is telling Jerry that she has told Robert everything and that they are getting divorced, she mentions that Robert says he's been having affairs. This leads to the question of the lies these people tell each other. My personal feeling is that actually, Robert never lies throughout the entire show. The actual statement of Emma's is, "You know what I found out...last night? He's betrayed me for years. He's had...other women for years." But given the elliptical way Robert speaks throughout the play, I think all Robert has actually said is that he has betrayed Emma and she has taken that to mean he has had affairs, too. When Robert and Jerry meet right after that scene, Jerry brings it up:

Jerry: But you betrayed her for years, didn't you?

Robert: Oh yes.

Jerry: And she never knew about it. Did she?

Robert: Didn't she?

Robert never comes out and says it. And thus, I don't think he actually has had an affair. He has betrayed her, and deeply so, but it wasn't by having an affair. It was by not putting his foot down when he found out, by not fighting for his marriage, by letting Emma flounder in this affair rather than making it stop, by holding her back but not holding her close. So, since everything else in his life regarding Emma was a fiction, he will let her have that fiction. Let her think that he turned around and did it to her, too, so that she can move on with her life. What's one more betrayal? In the entire play, Robert is completely honest, but nothing he says is ever what he truly means.

This led to the only real conflict I had with the director regarding Robert's character. In Scene 4 where Jerry is over for a drink and Robert launches into his monologue about squash, the director wanted me to direct that at Emma. After all, it is instigated by Emma's request to watch the two play and all the direct words seem to be a berating of Emma for daring to suggest such a thing:

Robert: Well, to be brutally honest, we wouldn't actually want a woman around, would we, Jerry? I mean a game of squash isn't simply a game of squash, it's rather more than that. You see, first there's the game. And then there's the shower. And then there's the pint. And then there's the lunch. After all, you've been at it. You've had your battle. What you want is your pint and your lunch. You really don't want a woman buying you lunch. You don't actually want a woman within a mile of the place, any of the places, really. You don't want her in the squash court, you don't want her in the shower, or the pub, or the restaurant. You see, at lunch you want to talk about squash, or cricket, or books, or even women, with your friend, and be able to warm to your theme without fear of improper interruption. That's what it's all about. What do you think, Jerry?

On the surface, that's a pretty damning thing to say to Emma, but the script has Robert and Emma sharing a kiss just a few moments later. If Robert is truly revealing his disgust for Emma in particular or women in general in this speech, then what on earth could possibly motivate him to try to become intimate with Emma just a dozen or so lines later? After seeing Jerry out, he would just go straight to bed. And just as importantly, why would Emma kiss him back? If she bore the brunt of that oration, why would she allow Robert to come near her?

True, the kiss doesn't go anywhere: She is crying because she realizes that she is alone now. The affair with Jerry is over except for the packing up and there is no way she can patch things up with Robert for she doesn't love him anymore.

Instead, that speech has to be directed at Jerry. It is Robert's way of telling Jerry to get away from his wife. It is not direct for Robert is never that obvious. Squash is a metaphor for friendship and to have a woman come between them would ruin it. Robert is not berating Emma for wanting to be part of the game but rather he is having at Jerry for having the gall to bring a third party into their friendship.

Now, Robert isn't a nice person. I certainly don't think he could ever be portrayed as the innocent party. His inability to directly articulate his feelings leads him to betray both his wife and his friend. Despite having the power to do something about their situation either by fighting for his wife or letting her go, he avoids all responsibility and lets them drown. Certainly the primary failure is the affiar between Emma and Jerry, but Robert does nothing to resolve the situation.

That is the reason for why Robert doesn't say anything: He doesn't know how. His passion is poetry where everything is told in metaphor, words have meanings stacked upon other meanings. A direct statement of, "I love you," or, "Stop screwing my wife," is the world of prose which he cannot stand. He doesn't know how to say anything directly and thus his only way of surviving is to be swept along in the actions of others.

It's All in the Timing

So, a first post. Time for the background. I'm a white male, living in San Diego, who has a day job as a tech support/business analyst and spends his evenings as an actor. I'm currently in a production of City of Angels at Patio Playhouse playing Stine. I just went through awards season where I was nominated for most everything I did last season but didn't win anything except for Cast Ensemble for a production of Betrayal I did for POWPac.

I have a BS in Applied Mathematics and an MFA in Musical Theatre. Coming up is an audition for Sherlock Holmes' Excellent Adventure at the Coronado Playhouse. The problem is that work is sending me out of town to conduct a training, leaving on the day of callbacks. The director saw me in Lend Me ashen and asked me to come to auditions, so I really ought to go. Hope that my first audition will be enough to be considered.